Your 5th grader has been going to the same school since Kindergarten and has had the same group of friends since then. This year, the same group of girls takes on some new friends into the circle, and suddenly, there's no room at the lunch table for your child.
As your daughter goes through the range of typical emotions, hurt, anger or disappointment, seeing her experience this type of social rejection can be an emotionally draining experience.
You may want to confront these little princesses or call their mothers to express a few things, but STOP yourself. Observe and listen to what your child is saying instead.
Acknowledge and validate her feelings. Comfort her and then ask her what she wants to do.
She may not have the answers, but together you can brainstorm different options, such as calling and reaching out to one good friend or approaching a different group of girls to sit with at lunch. She may even have to initiate her own social gatherings outside of school and focus on friends from outside of school for a while.
Refrain from encouraging her to “dis” the “mean girls,” as these friendship dramas happen frequently and the following week they may be best friends again.
While you may want to take charge of or fix the problem and protect your child from being hurt, it’s best to coach her through her choices, and let her feel that she came up with the solution herself.